Monday, May 08, 2006

Will David Blaine Drown?

One can only hope. Does anyone honestly care about his silly trick? Having a rough time of it, he says, trying to generate some publicity.

Look at me, everyone! I'm in a fishbowl for your amusement, so look at me.

If he said he was grand, would anyone keep watching? If he didn't act as though this stunt might be his last, oh, the danger, holding his breath, chains and locks and straitjackets and he might not escape, oh, the humanity...hype by any other name would smell as nasty.

Too much information, there, David. I really don't want to envision your peeling skin, or the possibility that you are becoming Swamp Thing. By the by, you might want to have an aquarium maintenance crew stop by periodically to change your water and adjust the salinity. We are, after all, a clump of cells bathed in salt water.

If only he would go away, and leave us all in peace. The World Cup starts up again soon - now there's an event to get excited about. I suppose his great escape will be featured on some television channel or other. As long as ESPN avoids coverage, I'll have a place to go where I don't have to hear about the nonsense.

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