The talk is all over the internet today - Tom Cruise's new movie is a flop. Analysts have multiplied and divided, added and subtracted and found the cosine, all to say that fewer people went to see the third installment of his series than saw the second.
At least the television shows, like 24, come up every seven days and the audience can follow the changing scenes with little time in between episodes to forget what happened earlier, or why they started watching in the first place. Poor Mr. Cruise has had to wait years for this third sequel, and the audience may have lost interest when it took too long to get the movie out.
Aren't they all just breathless with anticipation for the next blockbuster of the upcoming summer season? So much hype for the Poseidon Adventure! Ooops, sorry, I think they adjusted the name so that the idiots in the audience would never guess that it's a rerun of an old film. What are we all so keen to see in this second version? Why, what fat and dumpy Hollywood actress is going to play the Shelly Winters role,of course.
Play it again, Sam, the Hollywood moguls plead. Make it again, when it was successful the first time around, for surely it will succeed again. Unfortunately for those who sit on high, they never get out of L.A. to find out what the unwashed masses are pining for. How can it not be clear to them that reruns are not going to bring us to theatres, to pay out our hard earned, needed to buy gasoline money? After they got over being horrified that The Chronicles of Narnia was a money-maker, you'd think that they'd cop on, but, hey, they're in Hollywood, land of artificial contrivances and facades. They'll tell you what to go see, and that's the end of it. And when you don't go see it, why, they'll tell you that you're the Philistine, without taste or sense, but at least you've still got that ten bucks in your pocket.
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