Thursday, July 10, 2008

The Geniuses Of The MacArthur Foundation

For the brilliant and gifted, there might be a MacArthur Foundation grant in the offing. Genius grants, some call them, those bundles of cash that permit the lucky few to spend a year pursuing their brilliancy without worrying about paying the mortgage or the grocery bill.

How can they pick who's a genius, though, when they're not the brightest at picking employees?

Timothy J. Hoeppner is, or maybe now it's was, an employee of the foundation. He's going to be busy in the coming days, dealing with a misdemeanor charge of pointing his video camera up women's skirts. His genius selecting chores will be put on hold, possibly indefinitely.

During the course of Frontier Days in a Chicago suburb, little Timmy wandered about, adjusting his shoes next to any woman not clad in trousers. Smart boy, your man, with his shoe adjusting tactic that was meant to hide his camera manipulations.

Policemen aren't quite so dumb as they might appear, and Mr. Hoeppner learned this amazing fact when he was lifted. An officer of the law observed him in action, and knew exactly what he was up to.

Only one woman lodged a complaint, in all likelihood the one who was the last victim of the hidden camera trick. None of the other ladies on the film could be identified, but any gynecologist could tell you that the girls all look alike from that angle.

Sometimes those who think they're smarter than everyone else aren't the least bit clever.

4 comments:

Aeneas said...

Funny!... in a pathetic sort of way.

Where do you find all these varied and wonderful, eye-rolling stories?

You do have an eye for the ridiculous and absurd. :)

O hAnnrachainn said...

The world's an absurd place, isn't it. If it was sensible in any way, we wouldn't be writing novels and putting up with endless rejections.

Aeneas said...

Eugene Ionescu's absurd plays sound more and more true to life.

(And I read it in French. I was so embarassing... Hahahahaha)

O hAnnrachainn said...

The brilliance of absurd drama is that we can find real life within the absurdity. Life's great fun.