Jack the Blacksmith will wander the world tonight, and you'd do well to hollow out a turnip and put a burning candle inside. Fool that he was, Jack made a pact with the Devil but he's condemned now to walk the earth. You can keep him from your house if your Jack of the lantern is set out for protection. Too difficult to carve a wee turnip, isn't it? A lovely orange pumpkin will serve as well, and going modern with a flameless candle won't diminish the magic.
While you're safe and snug, with a cuppa and a slice of barnbrack to fill your belly, you must be ever on your guard against the fairies and spirits who will try to steal your soul tonight. Should the need arise to leave your house, where the Jack o' lantern glows bravely, be aware and be prepared. In the event that a fairy approaches you, be ready to snatch up the dirt under your feet. Throw the dirt at the fairy, and it will run away, releasing all the souls it caught until you acted. It's all about saving souls, this eve of All Hallows.
There'll be bonfires aplenty to bid farewell to the summer and light up the darkness of the coming winter. Don't be throwing your old Firestones into the blaze, for feck's sake. And can you not find someone to take that old sofa? The stink of it burning would put a man off his food for a week.
Happy Halloween!
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