Saturday, November 18, 2006

A Smaller No

I think I've found a rejection that I can tolerate moderately well. Literary journals can be just as impersonal in their refusals as any literary agent stamping 'No' on the query. By the same token, the journals can be far more personal and far more encouraging. Just feeding the addiction, sure, but that tantalizing little scribble grows irresistible.

An outstanding submission came back at last, over six months later, and it's a no as I would expect. In truth, I was wondering if the journal was out of business, having heard nothing for so long. But it was more than the simple form letter on an eighth of a sheet of paper, photocopied innumerable times. No indeed, this one had lovely blue ink, a careless and quick fist, and a name I can't decipher.

Sorry, the editor said. Yes, himself, the top of the pile, the editor apologized for the delay. The short story came ever so close, on the verge of acceptance, but then at the end....so sorry. That alone was enough to inspire me, the fact that my prose was good enough for serious consideration on down to the final cut. You'll never know that sort of thing from an agent's refusal, if the first pages sucked big time or rocked the house. Yes, I will continue to write, yes, because someone in a university creative writing program thinks I can.

And better yet, the editor asks that I submit something else. Not to just anyone at the journal, either, but to him. Send it to him personally, the man whose handwriting I cannot read. But what to send? What did he like in particular? Was he looking for historical, is that why the short story was appealing? Could it be the character study aspect of it all? In other words, what should I send next so that he doesn't read it and think that he was all wrong about the abilities? Inner editor, meet inner obsessive-compulsive. I'll scour the university website and get the proper spelling of the man's name, but how can I tell which short story I should submit the second time around?

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