Monday, May 19, 2014

Literature On The Label As Penned By Dr. Bronner

Isn't it exciting, the literati are cooing, isn't it cutting edge to cover a disposable cup with brilliant prose!

No less than Jonathan Safron Foer had this brainstorm, to cover the drink cups at Chipotle with phrases to give the diner something to read while they scarf down a 1700 calorie burrito. The fact of the matter is, there is nothing new to his brainstorm. Dr. Bronner started doing this decades ago.

The writer of New York City-ness says he was sitting at a Chipotle with nothing to read, and thought, wouldn't everyone just love to have a short essay to amuse them? Not only of his composition, but other authors could be convinced to write little blurbs of inspiration. Like, 'If you eat that whole burrito you've consumed more calories than you need for the day' sort of inspiration?

Inspirational literature on the label
Long, long ago, a soap chemist escaped from the mental health center in Elgin, Illinois, and ended up in Haight Ashbury, where he went about producing the soap he had long dreamed of producing. Dr. Bronner then designed the labels and added phrases of inspiration to those who were busy cleaning and might like a little break in the work. So you see, as far back as the 1960's, there has been a product label that is covered, literally covered, with words.

If you don't have access to a bottle of the soap that is all natural, you can read the text here. It's not a short blurb that you can rush through while inhaling a quick lunch, it's a genuine prose poem from the mind of a genius. Or a mad man. His sister did have him committed, after all. She thought he was out of his mind.

Sorry, Mr. Foer. Your idea is far from original. Not quite cutting edge. Just a new incarnation of an existing idea.

Although it's doubtful that Chipotle will accept phrases like:
"The 1st law of God's tremendous Universe is order! Absolute all-embracing, ever- evolving, ever-recreating, ever-loving order! Exceptions eternally? Absolute none!
2nd, every body in God's tremendous Universe must eat or there is no body! To shine on, eat must even the sun, consuming every second 4 million metric ton! To shine on, eat must even the sun! Exceptions eternally? Absolute none!
3rd, every ton of good food requires teamwork in harmony with God's law, timing-team-work- wisdom-power-mercy-love can reap 6 million more fruit above, above! Exceptions eternally? None!"

Although something like that might better fit the atmosphere at Chipotle, where people go to eat, than a short ode from Toni Morrison.

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